Best answer:

Answer by Taylor
First get a hold of her, then tell her how much she means to you….tell her how much you love her and love is crazy it doesnt matter if your inlove you inlove…fight for her. wish their were more guys like you, who would fight for his girl.

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My question is, that in India, and islamically it is a common practice for arranged marriages to happen, would i qualify for the exception that the USCIS has set in place for arranged marriages? Also, it would interrupt my job and my school semester if i was to take a break and go to india to visit her, would that cause an undue hardship?

i have not met her in the past 2 years. However, i have photos of my sister amd mom there during my engagement overseas. Any clarification/guidance would be great. FYI Im 21, and i dont need an BS answers, serious answers only please.
Even though i have pictures of the engagement party and her being the life of the party and my mom and grandpa putting the ring on her finger? i also have receipts of a ring, and gifts that ive sent her. Still a big not?

Best answer:

Answer by George L
if you’d met over the past two years, there’d be no question but that you could file. since you haven’t, you’d have to ask for an exception based on your faith. However, I’m unaware that Islam forbids you from meeting your fiancee before you marry. and from what you say, you could but it’s really too much of a bother, for various reasons. why would you have to interrupt your semester. is it impossible for you to use the Winter break for that? You can still ask, but I wouldn’t count on getting an exception.

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1. he will continue to live at his friends house for an indefinate period of time.
2. he will take a whole lot of space, i will call him only in the event of an emergency.

^^i understand the stuff above…but he also wants this.

3. i’m expecting a baby and he wants the baby to have his last name even though we dont know if were going to get divorced.
4. he hasnt given me any financial support since he’s been gone.
5. i see him spending money on himself while i still need a whole lot for the baby and i feel like i cant even ask him.
6. he said that he wants to keep the house key and come and go as he feels like it.

his main complaint is that if he stays over sunday, i expect monday, and if he stays over monday i expect tuesday etc. and that i am never happy with what he does to make it work.

its not that i’m not appreciative of his time…i just need a whole lot more help.

7. he goes out with his friends every night to bars and clubs.
8. his friends dont like me and i feel like they make it a “me or them” situation….i think sometimes he feels pulled by me to.
9. he has lost all faith.
10. he still wants to have sex and was very hurt when i said we should use a condom…..he was sad.

ok, so basically, we are on the precipice of divorce and as a last effort on my part i have agreed to these terms to see what will happen.

to see if he comes around. i already have all of his friends trying to sabotage our relationship so i feel i must do everything opposite to what i have been doing.

if i call him or text him to much…they say i’m a stalker, if he spends time with me they say i’m clingy and on and on.

my plan is to give him enough space to figure out for himself what he wants to do in his life.

i want to give this a try in a last ditch effort to save our family.

what do you think of the plan?

Best answer:

Answer by gracey
I don’t think him staying away is going to solve any problems. In marriage there’s a thing called communication and it sounds as if he’s running away from the issues. No married man should be listening to his friends over his wife and there is no way I’d tolerate him going to clubs every night. I would say end this just for my own sanity.

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Best answer:

Answer by Billy Shat
You need to steal her because she won’t go with you willingly.

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surely, because my now ex bf is extremely ignorant he wouldn’t have picked up that day when i called him back. he would’ve just ignored it, right? D:

he did say he would think about it, if its really what he wants.. but idk. i really do have hope for us. he also did get mad and told me “this is serious” after i started giggling abit…

im going to see him on sunday so we can talk more D: so what should i do?

Best answer:

Answer by Veronica C
You should respect his decision and move on…

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Best answer:

Answer by Ugly Betty
If you don’t feel the same way, then just don’t go back to her. If your kids want you and her to be together, then just try telling them it’s not going to work out between you two.

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Lately, though, we both got jobs at different places and we both go to college, which is out in about a week. She lives about 30 minutes away from me. I know its been tough, but I finally realized that it was life and just because we don’t see each other every day doesn’t mean we aren’t together. I finally got over the pain of not seeing her a whole lot, but it sounds like she’s losing interest in me.

My friend said that she was hinting that she had too much to do, and that as much as she wanted to, she didn’t want to keep me. I don’t understand. I’ll be damned if I lose her, just because of work and stuff. I know I can make it work, but I’m afraid of her dumping me just because. What can I say to help convince her that it can work?

Best answer:

Answer by Chexylicious
just fight for her, but there are just somethings left alone, but if you really believe she is the one. then do anything to have her

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Best answer:

Answer by DonChuy
sure….

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Best answer:

Answer by Veronica C
It’s too late. Move on and stop fighting over silly things. Choose your battles…

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4 years ago.. My current husband was married to someone else – had a 2 year old daughter.
3 years ago.. My current husband separated from his then wife, met me. We have since gotten married and have been for coming up on 3 years.
During my hubby’s divorce, he agreed to joint LEGAL custody and visitation.
Right after the divorce, his e-wife skipped the state with the child. We tried everything to find his daughter. Our only option was a lawyer to file contemp of court charges. However, we are not financially secure and could not afford the retainer fees and legal aid only helps the parent that has possession of the child.
After 3 years – ex-wife is back in the state. She contacted him out of the blue because she needs him to sign off on paperwork for his daughter to see a psychiatrist. Well the paperwork she said she sent, is actually an court order she has filed requesting sole custody and no visitation for my ex. She has stated in the court papers that he “abandon” his family 3 years ago. I was a part of his life then, I know that is not the truth.. He tried to see his daughter right after his divorce and the ex tried filing harassment charges against him (they were dismissed) because he would show up for his visitation. This is in the terrible state of Pennsylvania. She also stated that he is mentally unstable and damaging to his daughter. I saw him with his daughter during the separation and he was a great dad! And I know, there are no mental issues with him.
Now that she is back and has filed these papers with the court – we have to submit an answer as to our version and what we want from the situation. We still cannot afford a lawyer and she is still pulling the same crap.
She said she will consider letting him see his daughter if he agrees to the following: He must meet with her privately (without ME) for up to 1 YEAR off and on and then she will make a decision if he can see his daughter after that time. AND if she decides to do so, I am not allowed anywhere near her daughter even though technically I am step-mom.
Also, On their first conversation in 3 years, the ex told my husband that she is now married. And that the man she married raped her resulting in another child. Why would she tell him something like that?
Does this sound like Parental Alienation Syndrome to anyone?
What do we do?
My husband wants a relationship with his daughter, but the ex is making it impossible.

BTW – My husband continued to support his ex and his daughter during the separation and has been paying child support (on time) since as well. He is not a dead beat father and he is not an mentally unstable person.
What would you do?
Update to some of your responses: No, I was not the cause of their separation/divorce. My husbands child support is withheld via the state so not a problem showing he’s made all payments on time.
He is on the verge of agreeing with the one comment of not having a relationship with his daughter right now because of the drama. I agree the ex wants him back and therefore is trying to divide us. My husband is very non-confrontational and she is taking advantage of that.
Thank you all so much for the support and advice!

Best answer:

Answer by jacked fibras
move on,if it was meant to be,you’d still be together

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Best answer:

Answer by milamgardens
She can hum the national anthem.

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Nay sayers, save your Obama propaganda lies. This is proven and you’re just calling Obama a liar, no one else.

Vote for fraud, vote Obama!
Go Obamabots! Keep calling Obama a liar. We love it!

Best answer:

Answer by True Patriots Vote Obama
Election is in two days. The Professor can’t help you now. Try something new.

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Best answer:

Answer by Karen P
It can either be good or bad.
You will both find things out about each other that you never knew before.
It just depends, honestly.

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Our relationship is based on mutual trust/understanding & comfort, not spark (unlike our friends who want the spark). We can read each other’s thoughts. She’s my best buddy, & I love her. I cherish my time with her. We trust each other unconditionally. We’re independent, & never impose on each other. We have our separate group of friends as well as a common group. Our American friends start off great, but then later realize they aren’t compatible with their gf/bfs & get sick of them.

Best answer:

Answer by ❤Eros ❤Agape ❤Philia
It all boils down to Trauma as the result of the Hippy Generation. Chaos, lack of healthy boundaries, untreated mental illness, justifying addiction and drug use…

Since the early 70′s, we haven’t had a generation grow up Emotionally Healthy.

The US is a clusterfu*k of chaos and trauma and this is what has resulted in our inability to maintain healthy interpersonal relationships.

You should google a BBC Doc called “The Century of the Self”. And yes… you NEED to watch the first two REALLY BORING episodes in order to understand the progression or, more accurately, the degrading of American Culture.

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Best answer:

Answer by Kit
Sorry sweety – you’re screwed.
Your priorities are waaaaay messed up.
The only “thing” that matters in your little “family” is that BABY. Your “family” is YOU and THAT BABY.
You should want that baby waaay more than you do him. If he was a “good father” he would be talking about a future with his babies mother.
Get it?
doubtful.

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Best answer:

Answer by Sabina
The reason Islam says not to have relationships outside of marriage because it may lead to premarital sex… which is unlawful according to Islam. The reason is unlawful is because that sex could lead to a birth of a child… also the relationship is not bounded with contract…. which one would have if married. Say the couple decide they want to go on their own ways after all this has occurred. This would make it harder for both because they have a child together. Ok now lets take the child out of the picture… even if they had sexual relationships… that would impact the relationship with their future sexual partner (husband/wife). Islam says that the sexual experience is the best when one first has it after marriage (because it is lawful) with their spouse. When I say sexual experience… I don’t only mean the intercourse… I also mean any kind of intimacy between the individual couple before marriage is unlawful. Any kind of intimacy which takes place would damage their future spouse relationship. Now, you may say… will I will not get that far & my intentions are good. And yes that can be the case… but naturally it is very difficult because we are humans… and Allah ( God) has created us this way to be attracted to the opposite sex.

Furthermore, Islam is not against dating… long as their is a third party with the couple at all times … during the date. Islam just takes prevention measures so unlawful things can be avoided & thus prevented.

I hope I was able to answer your question.

Allah knows best

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Best answer:

Answer by dze
the more u focus on the subject the more they will want to experiment …

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im a 15 year old boy that is in a serious relationship.

My girlfriend, we just started dating a month ago, but we were BEST friends before we started dating..

All of a sudden, EVERY single day we would fight over the most dumbest things.
Because:

A) I dont Give her Enough attention..she seems like she wants to get too much into the relationship in a sexual way and i do NOT want that.

B) She wants to hang out with me 24-7, too much, she is way to obsessive over me. i am her actual first relationship..

C) she will say so many immature things that i do not like.

D) She is really clingy, and i try and tell her, but she does not listen.

E) She thinks she is in love with me, when i have only been dating her a month…im not sure if she REALLY knows what love is.

–I hate being all touchy with one another….my parents do not hold hands in the grocery store or anything.

–I do not like holding hands, or doing anything sexual in school (Kissing Etc..) i just do not like it

– I am not sure what to do, i mean, i dont feel that im “in love” with her yet or anything….how does she expect me to treat her right and give her attention and me to love her so much when she is being like this..

I really need some advice on what to do…please?

Best answer:

Answer by Jewelz
you need to let her know how you feel. Tell her that the relationship is getting a little too serious for you right now and that you would like to slow down. You haven’t even been going out that long for her to be acting the way she is, sure she really likes you it seems, but she needs to pace herself.

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Sex Problem
Before marriage my husband always wanted to make love to me.After marriage it just died.We probably had sex like 12 times in 13 years. I have always initiated but he would never be turned on, but instead say tired, headaches and etc. Even a ‘blue movie’ does not create the mood or excitement.He is not a gay.

Gambling Habits
My husband is always focused on wanting to be rich if possible overnight. About 7 years ago he lost $ 40k in socer betting. Then recently i found out that he had lost more than $ 100k in shares, this was ongoing for about 2.5 years ago, wwhich I only found out recently as he was hiding from me.I am very frustrated and have given him a piece of my mind cause now he is in debts and I have told him, I will only help around with bills in the house but not help pay this debt. The intial $ 40k,I gave him $ 30k from my own savings thinking it was a genuine mistake, but now with this new debt, I think it could be a habit.

Watching Movie Craze
Apart from not interested in sex and wanting to make more money, my husband is obsessed in watching movies.He watches a movie every night. Watching a movie equeals to breathing, otherwise he will die.Which now I too join along cause if we don’t have sex at nite, might as well watch a movie.

Moving forward
We have spoken about our marriage and he said he wants to save it and admits to his mistakes. i have had my mood swings as well recently cause he is never telling me the truth about how much he has lost until i really investigate which was very tiring. Now he said he was going to close his share accounts (by showing me documents) and promised never to walk down that path again.

Outing with Guy Friends
Apart from all that I have shared above, he has always enjoyed having drinks or chilling with his guy friends, either watching socer or just simply hanging out in a pub. I too enjoy having drinks but when I initiate an outing (for drinks or dancing) very rarely he would agree to go but if he does, he would want to go home by 12′ish, cause he is tired. But when he is out with his guy friends, it would usually be 2′ish.

Other
We have see counellors. Otherwise he has a great sense of humour and we do enjoy each other’s company.

I am in desperate need for help and really want to make this work.

Best answer:

Answer by new everything!
you want to make it work but does He?

it takes two for it to work.

good luck.

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Im in a great relationship with my faince, he is so social though. He is a huge people person. It hurts so bad to see him stay home all the time just because I wont go anywhere.

Any Suggestions? Thanks..
i only see him fri-sun and he is gone fri with his friends and sunday playing ball, so he goes out.

Best answer:

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Best answer:

Answer by witchy woo
Marriage counseling…if you think there is even a glimmer of hope – it’s worth giving it a try…

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Best answer:

Answer by melissag.0506
treat her as if she were your queen and she will do it back to you. if you really care you will create things to enjoy about one another. picture the relationship to be great and it will be. ignore what you last argued about and move on. Forget the issues and give her a huge playful hug. Force yourself to do these things.

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How do you get thru the lie… even though he thought the doors were open… i understand that part… but I just thought that he cared about me.

What do I do?

Best answer:

Answer by itsmeagain
Why are you putting yourself through this?

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Please serious advice only We’ve been together for almost 6 years, as a normal marriage we had our ups and downs, he is 32 and I am 25 . Yesterday my husband told me he doesn’st have any desire for me and he’s been feeling like this for a while but never had the courage to let me know how he feels. He said he doesn’t have any complaint about me, that nobody’s ever taken care of him the way I do,I work full time and go to college bla bla bla but that’s not everything on a relationship, that he doesn’t one somebody to take care of him, but somebody to feel passionate about. That totally devastated me , I don’t know what to do? He said he is willing to try anything to work things out but if his feelings doesn’t chance the best is for us to separarate cause he will not be willing to live a lie.
I love him so much I can’t imagine my life withouth him!!!! He said if he knew how to feel this sexual desire for me , he would do it but he doesn’t not know, and that is not normal for a young couple to be this way. He’s not cheating and told me it breaks his heart to tell me this but that’s something he doesn;t have control over. I went crazy and pack my things to leave and he would not let me, he said he is open to try to save this marriage but if my decision is to leave him it’s doesn’t have to end in this terms. He would find a place for me close to my job and school and help me out financilly until I can do it by mysellf. I want him, i respect him, i love him but missed the clues our sexual life was going down the drain.
He cried like a baby yesterday and so I did. I know have not been the best wife sexually speaking, I never rejected him but never initiated anything either. Never wore sexy lingerie or try to spice things up in the bedroom.We talked about me being more provoctive and playful two times before and I tried to change but never follow throught and this has taken is toll on our marriage. Also, about 4 months ago I started talking with this co-worker and we would text more than 50 times a day and he found the text msg, I thought it was innocent but he got so mad at me. I told him I just needed somebody to talk to ( We moved to this city a couple of months ago so I don’t have family or many friends to talk to) He said he was devastated to know I prefer to talk to an stranger than to him. He forgave me and we agreed to try to work things out. Again, I didn’t follow through. Yesterday he told me that I broke his heart two times, once when he found out and once when I didn’t do anything to mend his heart. He was expecting me to quit my job since he obviously had a problem with my coworker being aroung me. Also, I was on a 3 week trip and when I came back he expected me to quit my job since we moved far from my job but never did. He said that is when he got totally dissapointed at me and the small sexual desire he still had on me dissapeared. I told him is that was the problem we could work it out because that was recently. He said o.k but no to push him, that if out of the blue I start initiatig sex he would feel I’m being fake because that’s not the way I am. Anyhow, we went to bed and really wanted to make love and I told him what should I do if I really wanted to be with him, I was so nervous because I didn’t want him to feel akward but he was aroused too and we made love. He cuddled a little but then he stopped hugging me I feel so insecure now, I couldn’t sleep the entire night thinking I’m losing him.Please any advice, I’m open to ANYTHING to save this marriage, but feel so depressed because I know if I doesn’t work out i will proably need professional help to get out of the depression. PLEASE HELPPPP

Best answer:

Answer by astralpen
There is couples counseling specifically tailored for this type of issue. Please consider it.

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

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Our relationship is based on mutual trust/understanding & comfort, not spark. We can read each other’s thoughts. She’s my best buddy, & I love her. I cherish my time with her. We’re independent, & never impose on each other. We have our separate group of friends as well as a common group. Our American friends start off great, but then later realize they aren’t compatible with their gf/bfs & get sick of them.

Best answer:

Answer by Scootaloo
For teh lol’s

What do you think? Answer below!

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Our relationship is based on mutual trust/understanding & comfort, not spark (unlike our friends who want the spark). We can read each other’s thoughts. She’s my best buddy, & I love her. I cherish my time with her. We trust each other unconditionally. We’re independent, & never impose on each other. We have our separate group of friends as well as a common group. Our American friends start off great, but then later realize they aren’t compatible with their gf/bfs & get sick of them.

Best answer:

Answer by Caroline
This is pretty stereotypical.

Add your own answer in the comments!

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Best answer:

Answer by Tim R
i think you should move one with some1 that really like you and wanna understand you and would never want to dump you.

Give your answer to this question below!

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